i just had sex bonerless
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
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