STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
Randomize
