She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Randomize
