Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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