I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
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