TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
not ubering you a puppy
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
