you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
