Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
