I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize
