He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
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