What a fucking waste of an outfit
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
