i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
