We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
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