Just fell off a train. Bad.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
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