It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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