white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Randomize