ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
