Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
