i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
You dont lie about slip and slides
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
