I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize
