So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
