He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
operation have a gay friend backfired
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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