It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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