What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
