Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Randomize
