I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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