I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
50% drunk capacity currently
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
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