I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
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