I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
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