I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
she was so not down for the gang bang
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Randomize
