Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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