Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
