Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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