we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
I think I am morally bankrupt
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize
