Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
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