I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
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