Pappa wants mamma naked
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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