I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
I understand Curling. That high.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
