just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
nutella sex= disaster
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Randomize
