Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
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