Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize