I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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