scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
