what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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