Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
Actions speak louder than pants.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
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