we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Randomize
