I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
His hands were made for my vagina.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I JUST MACED MY OWN FACE
This is by far the best text I have ever woken up to.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Randomize
