grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
