I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
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