You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
